Thirst with Sheryl: season 2- Holistic Change

The Recap

For the last 4 months we have been working on building our spirt and soul. Prayerfully, you have been participating, by not only listening, but also doing? Also, you should be acting with intentionality.  Additionally, I am hopeful that you have been working in a decluttered space with your necessities of your bible, your journal/notebook, pen/pencil, & highlighter; and your intangibles of faith & expectation. We began with the Spirit first because it sets the tone for the entire journey. By focusing on spiritual growth first, individuals can establish a deep connection with God. Additionally, building the Spirit provides a strong foundation of faith, purpose, and inner peace.  Not to say, this can also influence and inspire changes in other areas of your life. 
Then we progressed to building your Soul. The soul, which includes your mind, will and emotions. The mind is pretty much the control center for our actions. Thoughts enter the mind and then we act on the thought by saying or doing. The will is the part that does the “choosing.”  The will has 3 perspectives:  God’s will, Human will and Free will. For more, please circle back and listen to Podcast Episode 10 of this Season 2.
Finally, we discussed the emotions, which is the 3rd part of the soul. Emotions are the voice of the soul. Now our emotions can lead us to sin, while God’s emotions or feelings are righteousand come from a place of love for His people. For more on this please circle back to Episode 11 of Season 2.
And let’s not forget the practices to build our emotional resilience, the 4 P’s, R.A.I.N. and the “Let Them” theory. These practices are discussed in episodes 14, 15, & 16.
Listeners, my prayer is that you have been following along & intentionally making choices that are leading you to a more holistic state. This is a good time to revisit the previous podcast episodes and tighten up and/or modify your notes/journal.  Straighten up your area, if you some clutter has crept in during these last 4 months. I know I have. Are you feeling, or have you noticed, that you have changed in any way? Remember one of the necessities for these sessions is expectation. You should be expecting change for the better. It is a process and if it is just one small change, we can celebrate!

Let Them

The Let Them theory helps us expose our controlling nature. Why are we so concerned what others are doing? Why do we feel the need to control them, because you cannot control anyone, but yourself; so, the Let Them theory is important and can be very liberating. Some of you listeners might be saying, “I don’t struggle with the problem of control.”  Everyone has this struggle in one way or another. So…
Here are 3 reasons we need, the Let Them theory
When we control & ruminate about something, we are showing a form of anxiety. When you act with overbearance with someone, or you cannot stop thinking about something, this is a form of anxiety. And anxiety is an alarm inside of you, going off & saying to you, “something is wrong!” And why are we so overbearing anyway? Because sometimes we think that forcing, manipulating, pushing people, etc. is showing a sign of love. “Don’t forget your wallet,” “don’t forget your umbrella,” “did you remember to take your headset to church?   In our minds, we are looking out for the person, but in reality, we are suffocating them.
Another reason we need the Let Them theory, is because it is easier to focus on other people. You see we trick ourselves into thinking that we are going to be in control if we control other people.  But it doesn’t work that way, Sheryl, because we cannot control other people; we can manipulate them or guilt them or shame them. However, we can’t control them. Every time we use the Let Them theory, we immediately turn the control back on ourselves. 
Another reason we deal with controlling behavior is because it distracts us from what is really going on with us, on the inside. The controlling is triggered by the way you’re used to things being, and you are not comfortable with the uncertainty; which is why you jump in and out of control.

R.A.I.N.

We have been discussing and placing emphasis on managing our emotions and building emotional resilience. We were given emotions from God, but if not careful, our emotions can lead us to sin. So, lets discuss this stress exercise, RAIN, which was created by Michelle McDonald and is a popular tool for developing emotional resilience.
R= RECOGNIZE: Acknowledge and name the emotion you are feeling. Don’t judge yourself for having it, just acknowledge it. Take note of what it feels like in your body. For example, I’m feeling anxious and there is tightness in my chest when I feel anxious. To get rid of this tightness, take a deep breath in and exhale slowly several times to calm down your nervous system. My friend Gayle usually repeats the name Yahweh with the in/out breaths. Yahweh.
A= ALLOW: Let the emotion exist without trying to push it away, change it or suppress it. Now of course with the example above, anxiety and the feeling of chest tightness, the deep breaths help calm that nervous system down to rid the chest tightness, but you are still aware and except the fact that you are anxious. It is okay to allow your feeling to exist
 
I= INVESTIGATE: Be curious about what caused this emotion. Were there any bad or negative thoughts that crossed your mind? What kind of sensations did you experience in your body? Like above, you experienced chest tightness.
 
N= NURTURE: Don’t beat yourself up for feeling this emotion, specifically if it was a bad feeling. Be kind and compassionate to yourself. I mean, you are a human being and not a robot!
 

The 4 P's

Pause. When you feel like you are overwhelmed, anxious or upset and someone asks you something, step back and take a moment to reflect. Psalm 46:10 reminds us to "Be still, and know that God is God." Pausing creates space for calm and allows us to refocus on God’s presence instead of reacting impulsively. So instead of that, Pause & take a moment to breathe deeply and ground yourself. This will allow you to resist the urge to respond emotionally and gives you time to compose yourself. We don’t want to say anything that we may regret. Psalm 141:3: "Set a guard over my mouth, Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips."
Pray. Now what if someone says something to you and you are insulted or offended?Before reacting, pause of course, but say a small prayer. Maybe, “Help me Holy Spirit!” You see, in moments of emotional intensity, prayer will help connect us to God’s peace and guidance. But we have to act with intentionality! Don’t just think about praying, be intentional about praying. Paul encourages us in Philippians 4:6 not to be anxious about anything, but in every situation, pray and make your requests known to
Process. Now really think about why you were insulted or offended. Is it touching on a past wound or insecurity? Also, consider whether the person’s words say more about them, than about you! Remember, you just prayed, and by inviting God into this, you gain clarity and discernment to handle your emotions with wisdom. This means you will have some self-control. Proverbs 16:32 reminds us: "Better a patient person than a warrior, one with self-control than one who takes a city."
Proceed. Now we’re ready to respond or make our move; but do so with poise; whether it’s addressing the situation, setting boundaries, or choosing to let go. It is a must that you act in a calm & honest manner. If it is not worth addressing, walk away, but make sure you are letting it go period. Do not bring it back up again later on. Now if you want to respond, maybe you can respond, “Let’s keep this conversation respectful.”  The key is to stay grounded, avoid reacting impulsively, and focus on maintaining your peace and values. Managing the situation with grace often leaves a greater impression than reacting with a salty attitude.

Emotional Resilience

 There are several practices that can assist with building your emotional resilience; however, we will just review 4:  
Now faith was one of the necessities that was mentioned earlier in the season that was needed for all of these podcast sessions.  Heb 11:1 LIV bible version Faith is the confident assurance that something we want, is going to happen. It is the certainty that what we hope for is waiting for us, even though we cannot see it up ahead. Read with my emphasis!  Practice prayer, reading scripture and meditating on the word to help with supporting and building your emotional resilience. Faith provides a foundation of hope and trust, allowing you to see challenges as part of a greater plan.
Unforgiveness or holding onto anger or resentment can block not only prayer but also, healing. On the other hand, Forgiveness creates a space for peace and renewal towards building emotional resilience.                                                                                    
Change your mindset! Embrace the belief that every challenge is an opportunity for growth. Instead of focusing on what the heck went wrong, ask yourself, “ok, what can I learn from this experience?”
Build a support network. Surround yourself with people who uplift and encourage you—whether that’s family, friends, or a faith-based group. Be very careful to pray and ask the Holy Spirit to lead you to your network. Everyone you think is for you, is not!

The Importance of Stewarding our Emotions

Emotions were given to us by God as a gift, and we should do our best to manage our gift; In last week’s podcast, we discussed that not only are emotions the voice of the soul, but emotions also reveal what is in our soul (i.e. the heart.) Additionally, our emotions can lead us to sin; thus, the importance of managing them. Today this podcast episode will discuss the importance of stewarding over our emotions.

The Soul Part 3 Emotions

Emotions…when you ask someone what are emotions, most people answer this question with, “they are feelings.”  But emotions are more than that. As the third part of the soul, emotions are the voice of the soul. We mentioned in last weeks episode that the will is the part of the soul that does the “choosing;” so after the choice is made, our emotions, whether happy or sad, etc. are the voice of the soul. Emotions tell what we value, believe, or desire; and they also affect our behavior.  Emotions can also show what is in our hearts…fear, joy, anger, bitterness, jealousy, love, trust, etc. 

The Soul Part 2

Back to the 3 perspectives or views of the will. Let us begin with the most crucial view: God’s Will. God has a divine plan and purpose for us and submitting to God’s will involves seeking His guidance through prayer, Scripture, and the Holy Spirit.  In a nutshell, God’s Word is His Will for His believers/followers.  There are many scriptures that point us to God’s Will in His Word, but I will just select 2:
Joshua 1:8 tells how we should meditate/ponder on the Word of God often, do what is said in the Word and then it will make our way prosperous or successful.
Proverbs 3: 5-6 tells us to trust in the Lord and not lean to our own understanding. It further tells us to acknowledge Him in all our ways, then God will make our paths straight or guide us in the right direction.
The next perspective is the Human Will. Although it is a gift from God, the human will, can be influenced by sin and our selfish desires. Our God is such a gentleman that He does not force His way into anyone’s life on doing things that they really do not want to do.  Look at this example:  a person walking down the street is hitch hiking and wants someone to pick them up to go a couple miles. Now this will not happen unless drivers see the thumb up in the air. In the like manner, God is waiting for people to ask for his help or guidance before intervening in their lives. Mat 7:7 NIV says Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. To take it step further, James 4:2 says that you have not because you ask not.
 Which brings us to our final view or perspective of the Free Will which is the unrestricted choice whether to accept or reject God’s love and direction. This highlights personal responsibility in moral and spiritual decisions. Some Christians take this for granted and use the excuse of Grace.  However, those that decide to use their free will to make decisions, shouldn’t forget Galatians 6: 7-9 NIV says Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. 8 Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. 9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

Soul part 1 The Mind

Now the soul consists of the mind, will and emotions. Today in Pt. 1, we will discuss the mind. The mind is pretty much the control center for our actions. Thoughts enter the mind and then we act on the thought by saying or doing.
Essentially, the mind is considered a battleground where faith, temptation, and transformation occur. Joyce Meyer has a great book called “Battlefield of the Mind.” This book instructs believers on how to win the Battle in your mind by lining up our thought with God’s thoughts.
Our mind has to be retrained, sanctified or renewed. And only the Holy Spirit can do this, but we have to do our part as well. We work in conjunction with the Holy Spirit. Romans 12:2 implies that the mind can be sanctified and aligned with God’s will through spiritual transformation. How? By actively seeking God’s truth and allowing His Word to shape your thoughts and perspectives.  This means, yep you got it, getting into the word. Romans 12:2 CEV Don't be like the people of this world, but let God change the way you think. Then you will know how to do everything that is good and pleasing to him.  

Life Scripture

So today, I want you to pick your Life Scripture. What’s a Life Scripture?  A Life scripture is one that will define your mission and/or inspire your journey. To find your life scripture, follow these steps:
Begin with praying & asking God to lead you to a verse that will speak to your heart and guide your path 119:105 NIV say Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.
Reflect on your journey thus far or consider any challenges and triumphs in your life. Are there any areas where you need to seek God’s wisdom, comfort or encouragement? Ask God and He will show you. Matt 7:7-8 NIV says Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.
Look for Resonance. Notice the scriptures that resonate with your heart and spirit. A life scripture will often give you a sense of peace, clarity, and alignment with God's purpose for your life. Don’t be anxious if you cannot find it right away, just continue to pray and trust God. Phil 4:6 CEV says Don't worry about anything, but pray about everything. With thankful hearts offer up your prayers and requests to God. 
Think about themes, like faith, love, hope or any concerns you want to address like fear, anger, insecurity that slows you down in moving forward. Isa 41:13 CEV is my life scripture which says I am the Lord your God. I am holding your hand, so don't be afraid. I am here to help you. About a year ago, whenever I would set out to do something new that God had instructed me to do, I would experience fear which would slow me down; thus, the reason for this scripture.
Now once you’ve found your life scripture or scriptures, embrace it fully. Memorize it, write it down, and keep it in a place where you can see it daily, print them out to place in a frame and put up in your office or bedroom. Let it be a constant reminder and source of inspiration😊